Deep down in my heart, I realized that there is a longing to be understood by others. But, I’m learning that no one or not everyone can understand me completely in this lifetime — and this shouldn’t discourage me.
I was told that I was a hypersensitive person or someone who easily gets hurt. This came from instances in the past where I would be vocal to others about how he / she have hurt me or others, especially when topics close to my heart are joked about.
As I was processing this with the Lord, there was a huge ache in my heart because I was trying to figure out specifically how to improve and move forward. I was very much aware of how high my empathy is and how I quickly pick up on my feelings and others’. But at the same time, because I feel deeply, I also speak out when I feel hurt or when I see something that needs to be addressed. Sometimes, this is good. But there are times when this isn’t needed.
A sensitive person may view others as being insensitive. This usually happens when others joke about certain topics or people or when they make unnecessary comments. On the other hand, others who joke or comment about these may view someone who feels deeply affected by it, as being too sensitive or emotional.
Both may not (or never) understand where the other person is coming from.🙃
I felt the Lord speak to me about how I can move forward with what I can control. He impressed on my heart these three things:
If the goal was to understand / be understood, then it will allow someone to gain more knowledge or try to get the attention of others. Then, he/she may eventually use this to control the situation or the people involved.
But thankfully, we were created and commanded to love the Lord and to love one another instead. This kind of love that God continues to show us is unconditional and it is the example of love that I should be applying. It means that I should love EVEN IF I don’t always understand or agree with others. Even if others don’t understand where I’m coming from. Even if I was hurt or will eventually get hurt by others.
God created us and knows us more than we know ourselves. This truth comforted my heart as I let go of the need to be understood by people. I simply don’t have to put that burden on others and others also don’t have to put that burden on me. The Lord already knows what is in my heart, He cares for me, and I can freely open up to him. It’s the same for others as well.
Once I learn to accept this, it will eventually show in my behavior. I wouldn’t need to constantly bring up the wrongs of others nor would I have to beat myself up when I make mistakes or have struggles that don’t seem to end. I also wouldn’t expect from others and feel disappointed when they don’t understand me and my concerns.
I am encouraged to surrender difficult things and people to the Lord. Not having the burden to constantly let others know of their blind spots. But, bringing my concerns up to God first and trust that if it is His will, the Holy Spirit will speak to their hearts and help them change. As the Holy Spirit is also moving in me. Besides, if the Lord wants me to rebuke others in love, then I believe He will clearly speak to me as well.
Even as I counsel others, I am reminded that I may not fully understand them too. Only God can. So, it is very important for me to lead them to Him instead.
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At the end of each day, I am reminded that life isn’t about me or any other person. But, about our gracious God who chooses to love us constantly. How amazing it is to be loved by this same God who knows and understands us completely.
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I have the same sentiments. I love this. Thank you for this. How to love difficult people in life?